i think that my biggest commitments were one's imposed on me in a way. i mean i stayed with the same employer for 26 years. 3 different job titles and it was half-time for 15 years of it. tough job and motherhood but that was only half of the time too but such a rewarding big project. now i'm still in halves living in two different places.
my art is small projects, never the big ones. little beads for my short attention span, then on to necklaces stringing the little projects into slightly bigger projects. selling stints short shows small shop
afraid to pull it all together for a committed project or is this still just the journey part to forgive myself and enjoy the process. should i expect more of myself and commit to something greater. i don't want the stress of a deadline or the commitment of a large scale project, i would rather roll along and take the ride & see where it takes me. cutting myself short? or living the dream of a freelance artist not worrying about making a living at it not thinking about the money but the joy of creating and sharing. halves again. half the year i just delve into creating and then the other half goes into the marketing, reaping the rewards in a tangible way.
but something nags that i am stillunderachieving notlivinguptoit somehow but i'm beingkindtomyself with these babysteps and it's just blossoming in it's own way.
repurposing objects and i'm like one of those fascinating vintage supplies waiting in a collection on the shelf until the inspiration hits and then i'll know what exactly needs to be done. for now just building the foundation, the skills, the networking and one day will amaze myself. don't push me but really i could expect more and don't take the easy way out.
collecting and gathering and spinning out in so many directions with ideas and inspirations, bring it into focus from start to finish but looking back quite a bit has been accomplished but i just need to find that stuck place that i'm perceiving and workitout and don't ignore it or hate it or fearit but examine it and hold it.
Halves, a thoughtful journey into the way you work, are, be, will become?
ReplyDeleteSplit in two or two halves make you whole? xox Corrine
divine discontent, if it comes from within, and not from without is powerful. And wisdom; who knows what "success" means, depends on the eye/heart knower's gaze on any situation.
ReplyDeletemansuetude
I think it's the name of the color itself.. alizarin crimson. Anyway, I just found this blog of yours. My definition of success has been as simplistic as my faith. If, in this life you have given and inspired love, you have found work that taps into your passion, and have found small or large ways to give the best of yourself to improve the world you touch (virtually or otherwise), yours is a successful life. Everything else is gravy. And I cannot help but feel yours is a successful life on so many levels. And what would we be if we did not somehow keep wanting to do or be more? THAT is the living I think. I look forward to following this one, too!
ReplyDeleteSounds like you are living and enjoying the process. That is healthy.
ReplyDeletehow did i not know about this blog of yours? and how did you wrestle all of the thoughts swirling in my head onto the page like this? and why do we hold ourselves back?
ReplyDeleteso many questions. and how lucky we are that writing is the new praying...
xox,
/j
I say if you are living from 'heart' doing what you enjoy and with passion...you are following your path and no one else's you have succeeded where so many still struggle to hear that whisper you hear...
ReplyDeleteIt is great to always reflect, wonder and from that comes new ideas, aspirations, even if just envisioned....continue to live from your heart and listen to those whispers within and the way will become clear.
small projects are wonderful.... and ... if you enjoy creating... big or small projects... you are a great success... love your writing and so glad I found you here...
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